I've been hexed- or it's karma giving me a massive bitch slap...

I

Have

The

Stomach

Flu!

FUCK!!!

I got it from Boo- I called Hitler and told her that if her bastard son wasn't so fucking cute, I'd kill him.

Here's why I think I've possibly been hexed. Teasing by word association. My near and dear friend is had a first date on Friday- he's cooking dinner for a boy he's been eyeing. Dessert- lava cake.....what's so harmful about lave cake?? Let me tell you...

Lava makes me think of magma.

Magma has 2 associations: Dr Evil saying "Liquid hot magma" and smegma. In college I used to say "Liquid hot smegma" ALL THE TIME!!!!

So, in a round about way, lava makes me think of smegma.

I told near and dear that association and that I tend to call lava cakes smegma cakes. He called me a cold hearted bitch, and he was going to seek revenge. I was twitching with laughter. The word smegma makes me laugh....the definition is just icing on the cake. It's the way the word sounds and saying is super slow...OMG... I can't stop smiling.

Two days after the teasing- STOMACH FLU!!! FUCK!!! I sent him a text informing him that I've been hexed by the smegma. He says he feels bad for me, but I'm thinking way back in the crevasses of his subconscious he feels retribution has been paid.